The Power of Play

Play is healthy and healing. We know that intuitively because we feel it. If it doesn’t feel good, it’s not play.

Unfortunately, as we grow up and get serious about our education, our livelihood, our relationships, we get disconnected from play. We tend shift into a mindset that play is the domain of children or pets, and a luxury we can’t pursue in our serious efforts at adulting.

It’s time reclaim the joy and pleasure of play, recognizing that it’s actually essential for our well-being. That’s right, playing is self-care! I like the sound of that, don’t you?

What Is Play, Anyway?

Stuart Brown, founder of the National Institute for Play, studies the subject extensively and wrote a 2009 book titled Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination and Invigorates the Soul. (He came to the topic from a surprising angle: He was studying the lives of mass murderers and concluded that they share a common lack of childhood play.)

Here’s how he defines play:

An absorbing, apparently purposeless activity that provides enjoyment and a suspension of self consciousness and sense of time. It is self motivating and makes you want to do it again.

 

Let’s break this definition down a bit…

  • Apparently purposeless: done for its own sake. Activities don’t seem to have value.
  • Voluntary: not required or obligatory.
  • Inherent attraction: it is fun, it feels good.
  • Freedom from time: you lose sense of time when you are engaged in play.
  • Diminished sense of self: you stop thinking, you’re fully in the moment.
  • Improvisational: There isn’t one rigid way of doing things. You never know what is going to happen.
  • Continuation desire: We want to keep doing it because it is pleasurable and rewarding.
  • There is no way to understand play without remembering the feeling of play: It’s a state of being.

And of course, it’s different for everyone. The woman who loses herself for hours fly fishing on a Wyoming river might pull out her hair if she were engaging in online gaming all afternoon.

What Does Play Mean to You?

If you are curious about infusing your life with a little bit of purposeless, enjoyable delight, stop and think:

What you did as a child that got you really excited? What gave you joy? What did you love to do, that you’d do for hours?

Linger in the memory—connect with that state of being! Guess what, you have just added a little play to your day.

Are You Ready to Play?

Play is vitally important. It keeps your brain healthy, flexible and growing. It makes you a better problem solver. It energizes and enlivens you. It renews your natural sense of optimism.

How will you infuse your day with play? You will enjoy it—I pinky, pinky promise! 😉

Mary

International Coaching Week 2016: SPECIAL DEAL!

ExperienceCoachingWebBannerThe International Coach Federation (ICF) has designated May 16-22 as International Coaching Week. Professional coaching is a powerful experience that is shifting corporate culture from command and control to collaboration and creativity. Coaching is developing stronger leaders, better communicators, more productive employees and increasingly positive people.

Want to give coaching a try? During International Coaching Week, I am offering a 30-minute one-on-one coaching session for just $50. Regular price is $400! At such a reduced rate, spots will fill up fast. Starting May 16th, contact me to reserve your spot. Only a limited number are available. Prices go back up to regular rate on May 23rd.

Your Comfort Zone

Mary says: “My job as a coach is to challenge you to go outside your comfort zone, to try something different to help you land in that space of what’s right and true for you.

Sometimes the challenge is one of tenderness and gentleness. That same client can at times require the drill sergeant who says get it done and get it done now. That is what I love about coaching – it is so improvisational.”

Mini Summer Vacation

Usually, I host my free teleclass on the second Thursday of the month. In July, I will be away on vacation so I won’t be hosting a teleclass.

Instead of a teleclass… Would you like to join me for SUMMER VACATION?
Since I can’t pack you in my suitcase, it will have to be a virtual vacation.

I’m inviting you to sign up for a one hour vacation WITH YOURSELF on July 11 at 11:30 AM CT. That’s right – take a one hour break in the middle of the day. Step out of your usual routine and do something special that YOU will really enjoy.

  • Spend time sitting in the sunshine in your favorite park.boy with kite
  • Take yourself out to lunch to a new restaurant.
  • Visit that museum you have been meaning to get to.
  • Treat yourself to a meal with someone you haven’t seen in a long time.
  • Go for a bike ride.
  • Take a historic walking tour.
  • Read a cheesy novel.
  • Rent a scooter or a Harley and toodle around town.
  • Sun bathe (with sunscreen of course!)
  • Take a nap in the hammock.
  • Drive the scenic route on the way home.
  • Play backyard baseball or a pickup game of basketball.
  • See a movie….

Will you do it? Will you join me and take a mini-vacation on July 11? If your answer is YES, then register for YOUR TICKET TO YOUR VERY OWN ONE-HOUR VACATION!

Register Here
 
 
 

What Really Matters Most To You?

Please share your answers to this month’s question by using the comment section below!

Ask The Coach – Free Teleclass

Ask the Coach!
Thursday, December 9
10:30-11:30am

Here’s your chance to ask a seasoned coach all the questions you have about coaching!

Have you ever wondered …

  • How does coaching work?
  • How often does a person meet with a coach?
  • What makes coaching effective?
  • How long do people work with a coach?
  • How do I find a good coach?
  • What does coaching cost?
  • Can I have more than one coach?

Sign up today and bring YOUR questions for a lively conversation on December 9th!

Register for Ask the coach! in This event is a teleclass.  on Eventbrite

Talk to you soon!

Mary

Let Your Heart Shine!

“Appreciation can make a day. Even change a life.
Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.”

~Margaret Cousins

Take a moment and think about the last time you expressed your appreciation to someone…



Who was it?

What did you say?

What was the response?

What were the physical sensations you noticed?

Expressing gratitude is a courageous act of vulnerability. In the moment of sharing appreciation, we open up and reveal a piece of our tender heart and our authentic selves shine through.

When we take the risk, a rich, vibrant, human connection is made – even if the moment is fleeting. What a gift!

In the week ahead, practice random acts of gratitude! Each day, look someone in the eye, express your appreciation and feel your heart shine.

You Can’t Say Yes To Everything!

Five Practical Strategies for Getting Stuff Done

Stressed BusinesswomanSo you find yourself in a whirlwind – so many things to do and it doesn’t seem as though you are getting anything done! That’s when I get cranky, irritable, and out of sorts.  This is not me!  What happened and how did I get here?  Does this sound familiar?

In the Growing Edge Teleclass last month we spent time exploring some practical, effective strategies for finding the way out of the whirlwind and back to sanity.  Here are the top 5 strategies from our conversation:

1. Remember — Saying YES means that you are saying NO. Before you say YES, take time to examine the ripple effects.  What you are saying NO to when you say yes?

2. Chunk it down!
a.    Instead of a project list, make a list of tasks and start with the easiest tasks to complete.
b.    Set a time focus:  What do I need to do this week? Or this month?  Only work on the tasks/projects that need to be completed in that time frame.

3. Do only one thing at a time.  STOP MULTITASKING!

4.    Daily Commitment list. Each day choose a few items from your “TO DO” list that you are 100% committed to completing today.

5.    Buddy up. Partner with a compassionate, non-judgmental friend/co-worker who will help you be accountable.

What strategy will you experiment this month? Let me know your results!

Compassionately yours,
Mary

The Power of Simply Noticing

I free myself not by trying to be free, but by simply noticing
how I am imprisoning myself in the very moment I am imprisoning myself.

Rick Carson, Taming Your Gremlin

During the last month I have been asked to SIMPLY NOTICE from a variety of teachers and in a variety of settings. Simply notice what I am feeling or thinking in a given moment without an imperative to DO SOMETHING. Simply notice my breathing. Simply notice the thoughts that cross my mind. Simply notice the tension or sensation in my body. Simply notice the color of someone’s eyes or the sound of their voice.

Here is what I discovered so far:

1. I spend a good deal of time doing! On a typical day in my office I am talking to clients, hosting teleconferences, sorting through email, networking, scheduling, writing, etc. I step out of my workplace and into cooking dinner, supervising homework and music practice, scheduling, laundry, etc.

2. When I am not busy doing, I was astonished to discover how much time I spend going over and over something in my mind. My TO DO list gets a regular mental review. The argument I had with my husband or my kids gets rehashed. My worries about my family get turned over and over. My business adventures take up my thoughts. Sometimes the thinking is incubating new ideas or activities but there is a lot of time spent ruminating!

3. The practice of SIMPLY NOTICING had a fantastic effect. I feel free. I feel the weight lift from my shoulders. I feel calm. I am empowered – in any moment I can stay preoccupied with my activity (mental or physical) or simply notice my deep breaths or the cool fresh air on my face or my daughter’s delightful laughter.

How does simply noticing empower you?

Living With Possibility

The blank page…
The pristinely white fresh layer of snow…
A new year…

Aren’t these vivid, tangible metaphors inspiring? I get to write my own story, make my own path, and set my personal intentions.

What DO I want?

Sometimes the prospect of endless possibility is paralyzing. It is so big, so wide open that it overwhelms me. I don’t know where to start. I am frozen, not empowered!

And then I take a deep breath and come home, home to my heart.

Today, I am surprised to discover that my heart is brimming with joy and satisfaction. I had no idea how full it is. I feel the heart to heart connection to those I love and those that love me! As I linger here, I can feel the swirling juice of life course though my whole body. I see faces, recall sweet moments, sink deeper into that ever present pool of love.

Wow … who knew? I have been so caught up in the hubbub of activity, I lost track of simply being. Now I know what I want for today. I want to carry this delightful heart-filling joy with me as I go on through my day – coaching my clients, prepping for my class, cooking dinner, connecting with my husband and children. Coming home to my heart, I can carry my being into the doing of the day.

How are you living with possibility today?